While growing up, I was interested in doing things that are creative. I love drawing, painting, and even performing. Ha! I bet you didn’t know that. That was my past. Pagbigyan ninyo na ako. 🙂
The crux of the matter here is that I suppressed a lot of that. Of course, growing up in a huge family is challenging in itself. To get recognized, you have to fight for attention. Or, you try to hide, so you do not get all the attention. After all, either getting the attention or not can scar you for life.
I opted for the “hide” mode because I didn’t know who I was. I was learning about me and in the process, I discovered that I was different than any of my other siblings. During that time, being gay was taboo. Being gay is never talked about and someone-forbid that someone finds out because you will be the topic at the dinner table.
Because of the “shame” associated with being gay, I hid all aspects of my creative side away. In doing so, I hoped that it would also hide the facts in me that would expose me as being effeminate and enjoyed things that are not considered “manly”. I hated sports, but I still played basketball or football because that’s what boys my age did. I wanted to belong. Even if I liked to dance or sing or perform, I put those things on a shelf and never to be exposed ever.
Times have changed. We are now more open as a society and as LGBT people. We can now be proud to show who we are. I see gay teens now who act as they were made to act, and they think nothing of it. Of course, we still have a long way to go but what we have today is a great improvement from when I was growing up.
As a child, I loved films. As a grown-up, I still love films. It’s an escape from reality for me. I can feel good while watching a film. I can get angry, I can be sad, I can be ecstatic. These are emotions that one can experience while watching a film. I am not a filmmaker and even if I wanted to become one, my dad would have said no similarly to the way that he told me not to take Fine Arts as my major in college. “There’s no money in it.”, he said. “Take up medicine, that’s where the money is.”, he continued.
I also love music. I learned to play the piano at an early age. I even took lessons on how to play the keyboard. Thank you, Yamaha School of Music! I never got to go beyond the basics, though. It only makes sense that I love films and music because of how great both of these go together. The proper combination can inspire, touch, teach, and affect people. That’s what I love about it.
I recently bought a camera with excellent features for taking videos. I wanted to vlog, but I think I’m best at writing than vlogging. I don’t think I can ever master the art of facing the camera. We will see. I have started watching tutorials on Youtube about video editing and filmmaking. You can say that this is my latest hobby. I want to learn how to create films and see how far it will take me.
Pero ganyan naman ako eh. Pag nasa mood, go lang ng go. I bought a keyboard when I had the same intention of learning and mastering how to play music. Hanggang ngayon nakaupo pa rin yung keyboard, collecting dust. I hope this does not happen to my new hobby. I really want to move forward with this.
All in all, the reason I go through these things is due to my desire to create extra income for doing something that I love. I watch vloggers out there, and they are having a blast making money from their videos while having fun at the same time. Why can’t I do the same? Di ba?
I am starting to create footage of clips that I will eventually use for my initial project. I want to get familiar with taking the right shots and editing them. I won’t get used to it unless I start doing it right?
You can watch out for mini video clips on this blog in the future. I would like to showcase my work to get feedback from my readers. I hope that you will support me in this journey (kung gaano man katagal itong kakulitan kong ito!) and hope that we can all have fun in the process.